just what i needed...

I can't express in words what my time in Nauvoo has meant to me. It has been way too long since the last time I was "really" there and this time was extra special for me. I was there alone and stayed in the Anderson's place in Macomb and was alone there also. All this alone time, gave me the opportunity to think about my life and things that have happened and things I want for my future.

Let me start at the beginning of my time in Nauvoo. I went to the 10am session and while I was sitting in the chapel waiting for the session to start I had a vision come to my mind. It was so real, I felt like it could have really happened at any moment (even though I knew that it couldn't). It is something that I really want and I was so excited at just the thought of it. I know that someday it will happen and that day will be one of the happiest days for me. At the end of the session I sat and prayed for quite some time and then I just enjoyed the peace that I was feeling. Being able to leave the world outside once again. This first day I did work for 14 women, what an amazing feeling.

I drove to Macomb and I still had not eaten anything for the day so I took my things to the Anderson's place and went in search of something to eat. I ended up getting a 6" sub and then went to Hy-Vee to get some water and fruit. When I got back to the Anderson's this was the time I really had to think about things and life. With out a tv or computer to keep me entertained I did a lot of pondering and reading. It was a great evening for me. The prayer I said that night was one of gratitude and thanks, it was one full of emotion and I felt the love of my Heavenly Father so strongly.

The next morning I was back at the Temple for another session at 10am. While I was sitting the the chapel waiting I was reading in the Book of Mormon. It opened up to Ether chapter 12, so that is where I started to read. I got to verse 6 and had to stop and ponder.

Ether 12:6  And now, I, Moroni, would speak somewhat concerning these things; I would show unto the world that faith is things which are hoped for and not seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith.

It was the last part of that verse that made me ponder, "until after the trial of your faith". I was thinking about my past and how my faith surly has been tried. I struggled for sometime after the start of my divorce, it was hard for me to see why my loving Heavenly Father would allow this to happen. After time and other events that have happened I now see that it was the best thing for me and even for my children. At the end of this session I sat, prayed and once again enjoyed the peace.

Life really is good...